One of the things I have noticed lacking in many relationships is a genuine curiosity into the others experience. Especially if we have been in relationship for a while, we tend to think we already know each other very well. While this may be the case, this can come with assumptions, judgements and projections about the other that may not necessarily be true in a given situation. It is easy for us to get so used to each other that we think we already know everything there is to know so we don’t bother to ask questions, inquire, be interested in a new and fresh way regarding our partners experience. Long term relationships sometimes feel stale or boring yet often this is largely because how we are approaching each other, not because this is inherently true about the connection. See if you can ask more questions and be more curious about each other instead of giving advice or making assumptions. One of my favorite things I suggest couples to say to each other in a light fun way is “don’t think you know me”, and see what comes from that perspective.